LA ART SUCKS

Hi

Art in LA sucks! I never seen such horrible time. I never meet such boring people. I never driving in so much traffic. I never talk to so many dumb girls. I never this lonley even in China where too many men live for a straight man.

Circus Gallery Size show

I had not been to circus gallery yet. I heard people talking about it and read la weekly article "Going against the grain, Circus Gallery has scheduled events for August, when the rest of the art world is on vacation. This is great for those of us stuck in town and looking for something to do."

Ok, gallery looks exciting and young.  I'm stuck. I go.

Week after week i go. It disappointed me so much. Size show was typical. objects you would see in gallery called "martha's gallery" . If a retard can recognize art in outside world, among public life, then artist has failed really bad. I'm sure the best of idiots could tell these objects where meant to be called art. And performances i see were mediocre. maybe not interesting better word.

Every week, people getting drunk. looked like fun, but not sure.  I did not talk to no one. Im confused why they celebrate shitty sculpture and outdated video art being projected? maybe they don't know how to be greater than to pretend art school still alive?

8.25 Jail and Treehouse Gallery

In front of gallery many cute girls with short skirts and nice legs. I wanted to touch. To bad girls were  only beautiful thing at show. Photos were shit. For moment i thought gallery might be cool since next to all bail bond offices. people who call themselves photographers never have good ideas. they are suck in Antonioni's blow up, which is stupid movie. outdated just like godard. There is no reason to have history if only going to breed shity culture. I can't remember photo show now but it was shit.

Girls are more covered at treehouse gallery. bad exhibition layout. There are thoughts in work but very premature. Tvs on floor. so 80's. so boring. a piece of scrap metal in middle with long pretentious title about car bombs. but i see no car bomb happen. i dont know when and how he blow up car. he should blow up gallery. art terrorism. yes. im on to something.

There 1 piece good all other bland like dutch food. 1 girl with nice smile. i wanted to kiss.

9.08. Chinatown. Forgeting.

I forget why I go out to galleries. I think people who go to bars feel the same way after many times. In the end most of us go home by ourselves, feeling even worse than before going out. The secret in los angeles is that you get so drunk you forget what happened and next day you forget why you went out – and then you do it again. I think this only way Los Angeles has not committed mass suicide; it’s too stupid to think about it. Oh that would be so great. Fantastic project for los angeles. We call it 28 hours before the Devil saves us all.

Before Los angeles dies I went to galleries in Chinatown and forgot many anonymous paintings. I hate painting. I can’t remember why I hate painting but I don’t even remember what they look like. At the university (before I dropped out) I remember going to party with many American students and one said something profound when talking about girls he would have sex with “ a hole is a hole” everyone started laughing and cheering. I guess a painting is a painting only problem I don’t want to stick dick in. So why do I care. I don’t. Maybe this is how gay people feel at straight bars.

I drink many beers (4,5) from gallery to gallery see if anything interesting would happen but I call friend to pick me up because I drink to much. Next morning I woke up, had super strong coffee that gave me bad toilet time. I walked down the street to my car and then remembered my car was in Chinatown. Fuck. Stupid los angeles.

9.12 words i think

This weekend is setup for great disappointment. I know. The week has been long. Money is running short. I need sex. I hope the galleries have free beer on saturday. Will i see any great art at culver city, im afraid to look on the websites. It might immediately depress me why some people get shows and other good artist don't. There are too many artist. Just as there are too many businessmen, too many cops, too many doctors, just to many crap. All the same. same model.

9.14 Hipsters and Art

Two months ago I moved to new part of town where many hipsters live - thats what people call them. they look like these people. I run into my neighbor  (She's hot) outside on porch. She almost looks like hipster. I dont care. We go to gallery in miracle mile area of los angeles together. Many Jewish Haradim. Show was dollhouses from hell and castrated cut-outs. Haha i just made show sound better than what it was. Show was boring. People looked like fancy dinner people who come after dinner looking for "high art". what a bunch of fucking idiots. I get  urge to do vomit performance in the gallery but then i'm no Viennese actionist and i think my chances in making out with my new friend would not be so good. So i wait for the hipster princess (she bored too) and we go drink whiskey in car.

The night continued unrolling things i have done and some i haven't done.   

My sources reported to me next day that Brian Megee Show at Redcat was filled with hipsters. OH NO!, they are infiltrating art scene i tell source. Source tells me show look like party everyone getting drunk. uhh i said to source. almost sounds like my night. Maybe i dont care about hipsters. im going to shave their heads off.

9.15 Culvery City Cunts

They had the most beer and the only good show in culver city art walk. Blum and Poe was good and everyone suck ass, even LAX was boring. Lightbox took out everything they had in back of gallery and put together shit show and then run out of beer to early. About every fifth person I walk by I could punch in face. Girls trying to sound smart so boys can think they are more than just stupid cunt but then they are fake annoying stupid cunt. Pretending is ground zero of los angeles social life. Since it has no culture, no personality, no history, no sense of permanence, Everyone in los angeles, even imports like me can easily forget how to speak honest. You are fucking boring me, this painting is stupid, I hate that show, no I don’t give a fuck who you are. Everytime I go to gallery opening my heart feels like a gun, I drive and walk faster. I look at people like im going to eat their skulls. These people are toilet paper I wipe my ass with.

Fuck the MFA

Fuck MFA. Fuck MFA in los angeles. Fuck MFA everywhere greater USA. Art school breeds shit. (read this line 100 times) then jump out of window. 

Burn friends with torch

No artist should have friends. No artist should have friends that are bad artist.  Bad art is created from having bad friends with wrong perspective on everything. The bad artist, bad friends, and wrong perspectives on everything create little art worlds that depress and waste time. Sucking each others dick, eating each others asshole, together bad friends and bad artist grow to form galleries like the ones in Los angeles.

This post was inspired by Angela Hanley, Overduin and Kite, and Redling Fine Art exhibition during last weeks.

9.28-9.29 Fat girls on stage

I woke up Friday evening to a phone call about art show in Hollywood. "what, Hollywood?". Free vodka my friend says. "Ok,  i take bus if you give a ride home" "k". The place was filled with hipsters and Brittney spears art. And for second it was more better than most shit i see everywhere else. At least it was stupid stupid. Stupid "as  found" in  collective american society. Sometimes being chinese in art setting helps sometimes know one gives fuck. In Bergamont, i say im chinnese artist, people bow to my feet, when i say  to girl at vodka party friday, im from Beijing, I think she think of 2 things 1) im not Japanese 2) do they have American apparel in China? I think this is why men like cumming on girls faces. It's just about attention. Bam, im here.

Saturday - No hangover  No regrets. I head over to Telic for a screening but get there too late. A fat girl is on stage with dog and golden mic asking people to give affirmations. "WTF". I want to see movie curated by glen phillips. People look ugly in audience. So i leave, get boba, go home and masturbate to internet porn and take more nap.

Francis Alys

No art today. No art this week. Except for Francis Alys screening at hammer which was a small disappointment. The film was too poetic and filled with stupid romantic art language and art critics who looked super high and have read nothing past 80's criticism. They probably dont know who nicholas bourriaud is, nor even hal foster.  But forget those 2 pricks and fuck that stupid old bitch next to me at the screening. She was late 40's, maybe tried being an artist in the 80's, no, maybe tried being an art critic, they sound more stupid - she was blabber this and that about how Francis work is so aligned with the sensibilities of his Belgium roots and how "morose" and how unachievment is so poetic and more bullshit that make me gag. Whats wrong with people. Is this same idiots that buy art. who the fuck buys art. I'm i making art for these old bitches that blabber nonsense. Fuck that.

I sat next to a pretty girl who left half-way through the screening. I like francis's work alot but stupid me should have left when girl did, chase her outside and make true romance and poetry for heart and dick. No art today.

Brain and heart attached to dick: Tsai Ming-liang

What it means to have dick and heart attached today, staged in the sadest cumshot ever film that made stomach spasm. 

The wayward cloud

Steve Turner Contemporary, GOOD magazine and 1830

Gallery openings and parties, are just like female sex, the tighter the better. If too open i dont feel anything. If too tight (like butthole) everyone complains.

Good magazine was a wide whore. I didn't bring lasso with me, so hard getting attention. so i drank free vodka and ran around natural history museum doing nothing and wondering WTF i doing. just like fucking someone, then you realize you dont want to fuck them anymore but you just keep going and cum fast. Same with party, i just get drunk faster and then leave and next day, like fucking somone you didnt want to fuck, you can pretend that last night, whatever that nothing was, is life.  What of bunch of shit we are.

Life after shit the next day was at Steve turner contemporary. Much tighter but i still talk to no one cause i dont care to talk to no one. and art could have been good if it was better.

1830 sunset. Big party and bands playing everywhere. on rooftop with bottle of merlot. life is almost good. Not much to hate but only the enthusiasm of the young people. maybe its their first party ever. A Hot Argentina girl talks to me about gallery she opening downstairs and how she loves the medium "acrylic". I wanted to tell her how i hate painting but that would not be good for dick, so i said  "i love your energy". And she wrapped her legs around me and dry hump me and said thats what her band does when they play music. tight is good. but i turn my head to another conversation and she escaped without my cum.

i find her and make babies that rip the anus of the world.

vulgar video art at sandroni.rey

Holy shit, give me a gun i dont know if i should shoot  artist or  people in audience for watching fucking shit video art.I walk into sandroni.rey gallery to green light (ok, cool) and big huge box/roomin middle of gallery (very cool). People inside carpeted box room watching video art. FUCK, i see overlap images, cheese cross-fades, bad camera work, and idiot talking about revolution, and other fucking bullshit. FUCK are people still doing LSD and Shrooms, reading aldous huxley and Ginberg in coffee shops. Who the fuck uses the word REVOLUTION. WTF? Give me a handful of knifes and i will have the stupid curator of this show begging for revolution. FUCKING AMERICANS! Your heart is as predictable as your women: STUPID. Why. I dont understand. Its like buying music tape, like using hairspray, like thinking love last forever? What artist thinking like this? Fuck your poetry, fuck your symbols and metaphor. Take them and ram it up Matthey barney's asshole ,where it belongs and he will love. Nitszche quiver in your grave, the 21st century will forget you.

craigslist date with Art teacher

Last week I put ad on craigslist. "Artist looking for artist girl (or related) Please have heart. Have blood. Nice smile helps.  Be cool. Maybe...
Me: Asian, thin, average height, 25. I can buy you a PBR or two.

bye

After many fat girls who think drawing and animation art (because im asian they think i like stupid things like that) i give up and realize craigslist was stupid idea.  Then wed night i get email from artist girl who makes sculptures/installation and teaches art  at community college (ok i say). She send her myspace and face pictures are pretty and but her body is not very clear. she look thin enough so i write to 30 year old girl back and after 2 emails we make date for the next night (i like her already).

I never like dates. i usually give sleaze to friends friends hoping to hook up without going to far or trying too hard. But sometimes dick commands man. Dick speaks louder than words. So i bring bootle of whiskey and show up in "art district" in downtown los angeles, next to manufacturing warehouses. Girl or women i should say has nice pretty face but a little thick like i questioned. But its ok. I have whiskey. She has a huge warehouse space loft like home. for 30 year old women she is cool. Many women that age take themselves to serious. not so much her. We make drinks, and we walk around her studio and she shows me many donald judd but more colorful like sculptures (ok i say) Im thinking about pussy so art not registering. I make 1 or two more drinks fast. She shows me her colored contacts, and i ask to look closer, then i just jump on her lap and make-out (haha). She likes my kissing and i keep trying to take off top in the kitchen and she says i forgot you are 25 (i think to myself 25 year old dick same as 50 dick). We go up her stairs into her little loft area and she begans to show me around and i shut her up with my kiss and my hands that touch her vagina from outside her pants.  She gets aggressive and starts biting. On bed she rips my chest apart and leaves bruise marks. So i tried to bite back but she doesn't like. So i go down and eat pussy but she stops me. What! she is hungry and wants to eat dinner, like we planned. My dick is red. Food? she stroked my dick from outside my pants seeing my face, and i think - this women knows man. So i respect and go eat dinner with her.

Fred 6o something. trendy restaurant in los feliz. Salmon salad me and we buy bottle of wine. But she keeps giving me more drink than her (ok, im the youn one i think). i grab her hand and place on dick while eating on stools. she rubs me while she eats. We leave in a storm, who knows who paid for what, 4 whiskeys and 3 glasses of wine, we are making out on the streets stumbling past aging hipsters with "creative" jobs as hairstylist and art directors for films. Driving to wharehouse in downtown, i lift her skirt and start fingering her pussy. she opens wider so i go deeper and harder and i think i almost crash so i stop in middle of downtown street and just finger her very hard till she comes. Inside her loft we fall on bed and she tells me she gives "amazing head" (ok). wow. white art teacher sucks dick like Philippine drag queen. I'm to drunk to cum so i taste my dick on her lips and then turn her around and start to slip dick in when she stops and gives me condom (oh yeah). We change into regular position. then i turn her around and do doggy position. Ass bounce is nice. White girl is super loud. I guess no neighbors to complain. I grunt for fun. And in middle of sex she start laughing. I start laughing. then i slip dick sideways and pull her hair as i fuck her harder and she likes. she turns around and bites me. Fuck. and she bites. Bitch thinks its war. So i pull hair and she loves. Fuck. So i grab her face and stick dick in and she pulls away and looks at me with pouting face and says "are you going to stick that cock in my face" i stick in and cum immediately.

she gave me breakfast this morning and kiss goodbye. I think we wont talk again. thats how los angeles works.